9×9

I probably can’t get anything done today, not even in a year. But in ten years, I should have a fair chance of accomplishments.

In the past ten years, I did get somethings done. I did what I was supposed to do: finish college, go to graduate school, and get a PhD.

Well, in the next ten years, I should do something I want to do. I also don’t really have other choice — that’s probably a part of that common mid-age crisis. One now have little or no guidance of what’s the guaranteed path toward happiness. I’m dropped in the middle of an ocean to explore and survive. So a direction has to be chosen. Be careful, but not too careful. Don’t waste all your time on hesitating about where to go.

I got more and more lost in the past months. Today I was depressed. I asked Ziwei, what are we supposed to do? To whom should I ask? Who was our creator?

He said your parents created you, so may as well ask them.

But they were not my creator. They made me to this world, but that’s not an act of creation, I said. It’s like a person built a machine to produce a product. Who would you call as the creator of the product? The machine, or the person?

“In that case,” said Ziwei, “it might be the Nature. Yes. The Nature should be the creator of us.”

“But what did IT want us to do? Why not give us a hint of purpose? Was Nature just bored?”

“Well, there may be no purpose. Maybe we were created for nothing — we are given free wells (if you are one of those who believe in that), and maybe it’s up to us to make the universe interesting. That could be all the Nature ever wants.”

I stopped arguing, and thought the saying, surprisingly, made some senses.

Later in the afternoon, I thought more about who created the Nature, and what could the purpose possibly be for that. I ceased the thought immediately. Better to set some boundaries — these may be stuffs that I have no place to question about.

(The featured photo has no clear bonds with the texts.)